Tuesday, November 17, 2009

A Slow realization...

Ahem…it’s been a while.

At least I can finally say that our house is (mostly) in order now.

Also, I’ve been posting to my other Blog about our move and adventures westward.

I signed up for a craft show (my first), which is in two weeks.

I need…product, product, product, which I mostly don’t have but have been busy working on.

I’ve also been struggling with something as of late.

I’ve slowly come to the realization that my paper crafting doesn’t really seem to fit with what other paper crafters are doing.

Everyone is moving forward...using the latest products and techniques, while I seem to remain in place.

Maybe it has to do with the long 6-7 months that it's taken to pack up our home, move and get settled in our new house.

So I’ve stayed away, trying to figure out what to do…what I want to do.

I thought of taking on another persona…another blog…but I’ve decided to stick with who I am, at least for the time being.

And to admit…that I do simple.

In fact, I like simple.

Maybe it’s boring.

Maybe it’s plain.

Maybe it’s a throwback to the style that we all started with…simple, plain and unadorned.

But it’s what I do best.

I think.

I’ve found that something chemical happens to me when I participate in a card…color…sketch…challenge.

I’ve even talked it over with the husband…who would prefer to have his fingernails pulled out rather than talk “crafts.”

I recently told him…“somehow I lose myself when trying to create for a challenge. I create with my brain rather than from my heart.”

And…I usually end up not liking what I’ve created.

The husband, definitely not the warm and fuzzy type when it comes to my craft works, listened and offered up this gem…

“It’s simple…forget about what other people are doing and just make the kind of cards you like.”

Hmm…I thought I was doing that.

But upon reflection, I realized the husband...is right.

Whenever I enter a challenge, two things happen…

I forget about what I like and do best, and

I try to become “someone else.”

And I fail miserably at it.

Or maybe it’s more like what a good friend shared recently.

She was bemoaning how she resents things that take time away from her creative pursuits, but then added…”but the honest truth is I like to dream of those things more than actually doing them.”


Don’t get me wrong.

I love to sit and peruse the latest craft magazines or sit at the computer visiting blog sites offering yummy card goodness.

I ooh.

I aah.

I drool over the latest techniques and products and what the rock star paper crafters are doing and creating and the world they open to the likes of me.

I envision creating cards…like them.

But it’s not me…or at least not me at the moment.

Like my friend, maybe I much prefer the reading and the “dream” of doing those things…rather than the actual doing.

Maybe it’s simply that I am a “hand’s on” visual learner…I need to see, feel, touch and see a technique, otherwise I'm disappointed in how my attempts, or as is more often the case, don't turn out.

Don’t know if that makes sense, but there it is.

I may change one day.

I hope I do.

But until then, I’ll continue to do what…I think…I do best.


Thanks for stopping in…


Dawn said...

Very insightful JJ... Your work is delightful and YOU!!! so just do what you want. It should be about enjoying the crafting... Good to see some posts from you. Sounds like you are settling into your new home. Take care

Andi (RrlScrapGal) said...

There's always a letdown with challenges.. That list of winners that doesn't include 'me'.. But, if it wasn't for challenges, heck, I wouldn't have a stash of cards to send out!!!
I hear ya on being yourself.. I love the create.. to just play.. and I love making things for people I love.. If I can combine a challenge with something that needs to get to someone, then it's a win win and not about 'me'.
Hang in there.. Your creations are awesome! I'm drooling over those shaker boxes...